I have to get this OFF my chest

This was originally written in November 2003.....

Can someone please tell me why the Hellidays (oops- I mean the Holidays) make people absolutely RETARDED when it comes to going to Safeway???? I go to safeway on Alhambra last night after work.I should have known since it took me F-in FOREVER to Freakin' PARK.. .that I should have just turned around and gone home. But Nooooo. Something in me NEEDED to hobnob with every circus freak, white trash, Autistic, bimbo who, for some reason, thought that last night was the ONLY night they could shop before Thanksgiving,
There was one woman who stopped dead in her tracks and screamed and ran to the center of the aisle to grab 8 CANS OF CANNED PUMPKIN like there is a shortage,as if in two minutes.. PIE BAKERS FROM ALL OVER THE FUCKING NATION WERE GOING TO RAID THAT PARTICULAR SAFEWAY AND SUDDENLY RID THE STORE OF CANNED PUMPKIN!
That is the point where I started my way over to the liquor aisle..
The highlight of my evening was trying to get out of the parking lot.. Walking to my truck I see these two lesbians.. I am sorry.. I shouldn't judge them let me rephrase-.. These two mullet headed, flannel shirt wearing,truck driving, fat tattooed bitches were unloading four bags of groceries..and their cart was right behind my truck. I make sure they see me - get in my truck- and patiently wait for them to move their cart.
Do they??
HELL NO! It takes them 5 minutes to unload FOUR FUCKING BAGS OF JUNK FOOD AND BEER
And then the more autistic of the two looks at me and acts "surprised" like OH- I GUESS YOU WOULD LIKE TO GET OUT OF HERE NOW THAT WE ARE DONE???
AND I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY IT TAKES THIS COW 10 MINUTES TO MOVE THE DAMN GROCERY CART TO THE OTHER SIDE OF MY TRUCK..
She doesn't even put it away.. Just moves it to the other side and SHE COULDN'T EVEN MAKE THE DAMN CART GO. I have seen trained GERBILS do a better job!!
And if that wasn't bad enough.. Everyone that was trying to leave or park.. Thought that they could just go wherever they wanted to whenever they wanted to
Three cars were all trying to go to the same spot all traveling in DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS!
YOU WOULD HAVE THOUGHT I HAD AN ANEURYSM BY THE TIME I GOT OUT OF THERE.. Holy Mother of GOD
Okay.. Stepping off my soapbox now.. End of rant.